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Songs from Superchick / Rock and a Hard Place...
(introduced by SJM)...

Jimmy Collins and Aesop Murray, from the novels Superchick and Rock and a Hard Place, play in a band called The Grove. Anyone who grew up on the north side of Dublin in the last thirty years will tell you exactly where the name of the band comes from. The Grove was a disco, of sorts, for ages sixteen and up, in Clontarf. While sadly no longer with us, it was for many years the place to be on a Saturday night for Dublin teenagers looking for clean, wholesome fun (ahem).

Anyway, during the novels, there are a lot of songs being played and talked about - both popular and originals. Below, are the lyrics of some of these songs. I hope to record them all and post the actual music here too with my old band, Yer Mot's a Dog. Watch this space.

In many ways, YMAD was where a lot of the ideas for The Grove came from. Indeed, the song was originally a YMAD song, although not one that ever made it into the live set. 

Ive loved a lot of women in my time on this blue ball
Some cute some smart some sexy, didnt matter loved them all
Dancer, lover, drinker, never knew which one to pick
Til I found them all in one girl and I called her Superchick

That chick was unbelievable, I swear shed read my mind
She knew exactly what Id want, never bitched and never whined
She never dragged me shopping and I never met her folks
But she always looked amazing and she laughed at all my jokes 

She loved to watch the football and her favourite food was steak
Shed put her legs behind her head, she made me chocolate cake
Her idea of a quiet night in was pizza, beer and sex
She told me Im amazing, and so much bigger than her ex

She never wore a stitch in bed and she loved to wash my car
And when I got too drunk to drive, shed collect me from the bar
She paid all her own phone bills and the fridge was never bare
Her favourite show was Star Trek and she hated Richard Gere

So what am I sposed to do now that our love is on the rocks
How can I go back to normal chicks and dirty socks
Ive thrown it all away because I listened to my dick
And she caught me with her sister now Ive lost my Superchick

As I said, this song was first written for Yer Mot's a Dog. The original lyrics are pretty much the same as the ones above. The original tune, however, was something we were never too happy with. We're currently re-working this. 

Landlady Lover
It all started when I lost my stupid key 
It was late and I was drunk and so you see 
How was I to know what Cupid had in store 
When I went knocking on my landlady's door 

She stood there in a black lace negligee 
Her husband dead, and my girlfriend away 
And so she smiled and invited me inside 
Closed the door and proceeded to provide 

Landlady, landlady - she's the best landlady I ever had 
Landlady, landlady - with the keys to my pants and the keys to my pad 
She has the keys to my pants...and the keys to my pad 

My friend don't understand what's going on 
He says your landlady's older than your mom 
I say that's true but she's got your girlfriend beat 
Cos my landlady can take out her teeth 


She comes up to my room sometimes to play 
She can't get enough, what can I say 
She calls me downstairs sometimes to eat 
She brings the wine and I bring the meat 

And now the landlady calls me her Prince 
As she lies there all smiles and blue rinse 
I called her Angel and said she's heaven-sent 
And now I get a better deal on my rent

Final Chorus

Ah - a classic from the YMAD vault! I wrote the lyrics on a paper menu in a cafe in Tokyo. The blues boogie came to Brian over pizza and beer. A popular one at gigs, this song is actually based on a true story. I can only say that the protagonists were very, very bold and that neither of them were me.

Alibi [Listen to the MP3 (4Mb)]

It's 3am now and you can't go home
You're lying there in bed but it's not your own
And you can't call her, what would you say?
It could just take one more lie to give the game away

And so you want to tell her that you stayed with me,..all last night
Well I don't wanna be your alibi,....your alibi

You're not sure when it started , seems so long ago
But if you're true to yourself you know it was always so
And if you see me laughin' you don't get the joke
You may not have crashed and burned but I can see there's smoke
And now you're askin' me if you should stay,..or say goodbye
Well I don't wanna be your alibi

Your alibi
Your alibi
I won't be your alibi
I won't be your alibi
I won't be your alibi
I won't be your alibi
I won't be your alibi
Late nights, fist fights

Won't leave the bar till they turn out the lights
You pay and they'll stay
Leave redemption for another day
You know how it goes
It's one more chance or one more lap dance

And I won't be your alibi
No I won't be your alibi
No I won't be your alibi

This one is all Brian's, but it is mentioned in the book as being one of Jimmy's songs and Brian said I could put it here. It's the first YMAD song that wasn't a piss-take of some description - brilliant stuff. Brian recorded it with the band after I'd left. Funny how the music improved once I was gone!! Eric Persson is playing bass and Jonie Hell is the drummer. Brian is singing and playing guitars. If you listen carefully you can hear me not doing anything at all, except wishing that I'd written it!